From Poop Univ. Library
from the 4th floor- two spottings of poop at the PU Library (pun intended)
Piles of actual cataloged books- I don't think it would say "third row, second box from the bottom" in the catalog, so happy hunting!
So I think you can guess Poop U. is in the South.
More from the crime log
(I like to think this was all involving the same group of people- some huge party in a parking lot with tons of free snacks, monkeys and drugs. One can only hope.)
Thursday, September 07, 2006
Welcome to the Poop Police "policenews" daily e-mail list, a log of
significant reported incidents and case updates.
The following incidents are being investigated by the Poop University
Police Department:
West Campus:
09-05-06 at 8:02 am at Poop Dorm: An employee reported that he found a snack machine damaged. The glass was broken out of the machine and glass was all over the floor. One or more suspects had stolen all of the snacks out of the machine.
09-05-06 at 2:22 pm at the Poop University Primate Center: An employee reported that someone had used her maiden name and duke work address to make fraudulent purchases. It does not appear at this time that the employee's procurement card was used.
09-05-06 at 2:54 pm at Blue Zone 4: A student reported that they left a generator, two speakers and an amplifier unattended and unsecure in the woods near the lot after tailgating with a large group of people. The student went to the at about 6:00 pm on 09-02-06 and did not return for the items until 2:00 am in the morning. At that time all the items were missing.
09-06-07 at 10:43 pm on Poop Blvd: A Poop officer stopped a speeding vehicle. The driver had an outstanding warrant for Failure to Appear in Court for a felony drug charge. The Poop officer placed the driver under arrest and the driver received a $5000.00 secured bond.
from PU's Daily Crime Log
09-03-06 at 2:40 pm in Poop Library: A student reported that she left a book bag containing a Dell Inspiron laptop, a blue flexible lap top, computer mouse and power cord on a table at 1:40 pm. She covered the bag with her sweat shirt and left the area until 2:40 pm. She noticed that her bag had been moved and the items above were missing. Another student saw a suspicious man in the area, but did not call police.
09-04-06 at 3:39 pm in Poop Quad: A student reported that she left 50 one hundred dollar bills ($5000.00) in an unsecure desk drawer in her dorm room. She last saw the money on 09-01-06. During the weekend she had at least two visitors to her room who were left unattended and she left her door unlocked on at least two different occasions when she was not there. She noticed the money missing on 09-04-06 at 9:00 am.
Central Poop Campus:
09-03-06 at 1:00 pm at the Gravel Lot on Poop Street: A student reported that he parked his car in the lot at 2:00 pm on 09-03-06. He left his car unlocked and his iPod in the car. When he returned at 5:00 pm, the iPod was missing.
From Working at Poop newsletter
"As a Poop staff member, I certainly see the Plaza as a resource for people working at Poop. There are not many places on campus where you can sit at a table in the open air and work or meet with colleaguesm, or just relax and eat lunch."
"Want to surf the Web? There's wireless access. Want to hear live music? Take a seat in the grass. Want to sit under a shade tree. Pick from 13."
also note the stats touted...
13,100 linear feet of Brazilian hardwood for walkway
1,130 linear feet of stainless steal handrail.
1,280 square feet of Fescue sod.
